Alright, I am going to start by posing a question to you all, “have you ever met a guy who actually enjoys getting their picture taken?” If you have, I’d kill to meet him because I surely have never!
Whether it’s their wedding day, an engagement session, family pictures, or just a selfie at the Luke Bryan concert they went. Most of the time they don’t see why it’s necessary, they would rather spend their money elsewhere (or not spend it at all), they don’t like how stressed we, their wives, get about every single detail beforehand, and to top it all off — they think it’s a waste of time.
This is exactly what we want to avoid completely because ultimately, I know that BOTH you AND your guy’s attitude determines SO MUCH about how a session goes. The kids notice, I notice, it’s noticeable in the poses and the lack of connection, its noticed in their eyes. Turns out “there is a million other places I’d rather be” is pretty easy to see in photos!
So now you are like “okay, what is the secret sauce to get my guy to at least tolerate photo taking?” Here we go with my THREE steps.
STEP 1: EMPATHY
Typically, guys walk into a photo session grumpy because they’ve had a bad experience in the past! This maybe because of a crazy photographer in the pasted, a messy session, or shot maybe his kids where a nightmare and the photographer did not know how to handle that. Or heck maybe a session that took 5+ hours and it was designed from the devil. I mean I DON’T blame him at all for hating it if that was his experience. I am here to share I AM not crazy, I handle kiddos great (insert the fact I have two of my own), I don’t take 8 years to take pictures, and I am super organized in the photo taking process.
Try to understand where your man is coming from and then let him know that you get it — that sometimes sessions have stressed you out too. But that the reason you chose ME is because of the “stress-free” atmosphere that I deliver!
Okay, now that I have outlined it for you, sit down with your guy and listen to him and reassure him it will be okay!
STEP 3: EXPECTATIONS
Now that you have stepped into his mind and understand why he doesn’t want to take photos, it’s time for me to remind you — men are a lot like toddlers! — I’ve noticed that if you take the time to tell them what to expect and set realistic expectations it allows them to process this whole photo thing better. . Here are some typical things to expect:
OUTFITS: You will ask his opinion on outfits, tell him to pretend to care (and because he really doesn’t, feel free to email me, text me, or facebook message me for my opinion if you want)
DAY OF: you will probably be feeling insecure, nervous, and a little stressed because you haven’t been in front of a camera in a year and you don’t like ______________ about yourself, so now is not the time to get mad and grumpy at you for planning this in the first place.
BRIBING: let him know that the kids might cry a time or two and that’s okay! It will be okay! Plus, if you don’t normally bribe your children, now is great time to let him know that it may happen
KIDS: explain to him that getting kids ready for a photo shoot is NOT easy and you are going to need his help by doing __________________. Whether it’s helping get them bathed and dressed or keeping them clean after you get them dressed.
STEP 3: INVOLVEMENT
You know how when already have a toddler and you are having a new baby in the family how you ask for that toddler’s help after the baby arrive’s (ex: can you be my big helper and go get a diaper for mommy!, etc.). Well, men react better if they are involved or at least FELL involved in the process. Nobody likes being told what to do, especially if it seemed like a waste of time.
So let’s start including our guy in the process, even if they don’t THINK that’s what they want!
Tell him why photos are important to you…I’m talking about digging deep and telling him why having photos of you during this stage are important.
Show him why you chose ME! Take him to my website or show him that one blog post that you loved so much! Take him to my facebook and show him how each week I post about authentic motherhood.
Have him fill out the questionnaire with you!
Have him help pick out your outfits, that way he will feel comfortable in what he is wearing.
Involve your guy in the process and he won’t just pretend to care, this whole thing will become not just YOUR thing but his too!
